Ever find yourself pulling into your driveway and wondering how you got there? Not in an existential way—just literally no memory of the last 15 minutes of driving. Congratulations: you’ve successfully completed autopilot mode. No points deducted.

Posture, Prana, Presence, a 3 minute , 6 seconds listen to…

Or how about that party, where someone is enthusiastically talking at you, you see their lips moving, probably about their new job or a juice cleanse—and you’re nodding, smiling, utterly unaware of the actual topic.
A true masterclass in social camouflage.

And then there’s the Talk. You know the one.
The Important Conversation with a friend or partner where you’re meant to really connect…
But instead, your brain is busy filing taxes, or wondering if you left the stove on, or daydreaming about a slightly better version of this exact conversation.

Being present—it’s hard.
Having your mind and body occupy the same zip code? Practically a superpower.

But here’s the twist: this isn’t your fault.
This beautifully scattered state of being? You came equipped with it.
It’s called Ego—your internal project manager.
Its job? Select, protect, overthink, and occasionally ruin a perfectly good moment with a memory from 2009.
Useful? Absolutely.
Overzealous? Constantly.

And in our era of infinite inputs and existential TikToks, Ego is pulling double shifts.
The cost? Sometimes your soul—spelled S-O-U-L, in case you forgot you had one—gets shoved backstage.

You end up:

• Driving without noticing the trees.
• Partying without seeing the person behind the personality.
• Talking without actually listening.

Posture. Prana. Presence.
It sounds like a yoga poster, but it’s actually the secret handshake for being human.
Stay grounded where you are.
Keep on breathing—not just because it keeps you alive, but because it reminds you that you are alive.
Feel your presence. Seriously. You’re right here. Try not to ghost your own moment.

So here’s the pitch:
Keep your Ego. It’s sharp. It’s efficient. It would make a killing on Wall Street.

Just… don’t let it drive all the time.
Check in. Breathe. Look around. Be in the actual now.

Wishing you a grounded and deep breathing presence in where you are nd what you’re doing right now

Ingrid

To the Body Language of Energy Pilgrim Circle Page 

The post Posture, Prana, Presence appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

a 3 minute and 16 seconds listen to.

Are you truly living life on your own terms?
Or are your choices shaped by habits, trends, and outside influences? Do you follow your own preferences,  buy only what you truly need, eat what genuinely nourishes you? In short: are you truly living the life you choose?

Take a quiet moment and ask yourself who’s really in charge of your life. Grab a pen and write down the first three things you bought, shared, or forwarded lately. Were they your own choices ? Or were they triggered by social media, the news, netflix or a stand up comedian?

Opinions vary of course , but it’s commonly said that we consciously choose only about 5% of our daily actions. The rest? Patterns  and likes we’ve picked up along the way.

In energy medicine, this is called “the habit field”: the things you tend to do; the route you usually take home, the train you always take, the food that is on offer at the supermarket, the clothes that are in season , the (Black Friday) sales you follow; most of it shaped by outside forces—marketeers, trends, influencers (a word I frankly dislike), and societal norms, rather than wat your inner self has to say about it.

Now imagine this: you get a full year away from it all. No ads, no social media, no breaking news, no latest must-haves. Just real, uninterrupted time. What would you do with it?

I don’t mean to sound dramatic, but people who go through a personal crisis often find themselves in exactly that situation, without ever asking for it. And when they look back on this life intervention you’ll ’ll  often hear them say it was a turning point, a wake-up call that made them aware of what truly matters.

So, let’s say you got that clean slate, regardless of your current circumstances. What would you leave behind in your old life? And what would you choose to bring with you in the new?

That question lies at the heart of the Lifestyle Vision Quest I’ll be hosting next Tuesday, the 20th, at the Natural Health Centre in Scheveningen. It’s part of what I call a Pilgrim Circle: a small group of no more than 12 people from all walks of life, coming together to reflect, share, and explore life’s choices in a deeper way.

If that resonates with you as k your search engine to look up thehague-naturalhealthcentre.com , click on the Events page and register for the Lifestyle Vision Quest.

And until then—each time before you go to sleep—ask yourself this:

What choice did my inner me make today that stepped outside the box of habit and expectation?

wishing you a day filled with possibilities,

Ingrid Schippers for Dutchbuzz, the radioprogram for internationals in and around The Hague

The post What to leave behind and what to bring along appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

Do you still have old diaries ? When you re-read these records of your life story, do you recognise yourself in what you wrote down maybe decades ago?  I find old journals can hold surprising revelations, describing life lessons that had yet to reach their full potential at the time they were recorded, yet already sort of glimmered at the horizon of conscious awareness with thoughts and feelings that years later start to make sense.

Journaling I find, is like talking to a life coach, but then that life coach is you, yourself . It’s a process. While writing, I find my way through, forests, fields, seas and mountain ranges of words and sentences until at some point I find myself ‘out of the woods’ or ”on top of the world’, rescued from my sea of troubles.

Journaling is a very important part of the ritual of mid-winter contemplation. It’s a way of talking to oneself through writing. Giving titles to the dreams one has, helps to  become more aware of their meaning. Words and sentences are like magic in that sense.  They hold the ability to transport thoughts, feelings and intentions to higher levels of understanding

The gift of expressing oneself – either through painting, sculpting, dance,  song, sound or any other form of art  is a precious human trait and certainly there for a reason, going as far back as the times when humanity as we know it today was still in it’s early stages.  Art may well be among the oldest tricks in town to get in touch with the true essence of who one is.

The first written expressions ever found date back to roughly 3400 years B.C.  within Sumerian civilisation, a relatively short amount of time on the scale of human history.

In our present day and age, writing, using language is the main source awareness. Even more so it often supersedes, intuition or inspiration. But just like midwinter contemplation originates from ancient ways of looking at life, the written word also contains deeper meaning. Words have Soul and Spirit. The way we use them tells a lot about who we are.

 to read more on how to practice the winter solstice contemplation ritual click here. 

  On the right side of this blog you can also draw your own card and see what it summons up from within.

The post 6 of Tools: Journaling appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

The Tarot of Marseille  the Nan Yar Who Am I cards are based on, depicts card number V as The Pope.
Seeing the Marseille Tarot came into the world at the end of medieval times, when the pope in Western Culture had been regarded as the representative of God on earth for more than a thousand years, the interpretation of this  Archetype as the spiritual aspect of life on earth makes sense.

As the interpretation of the Tarot changes throughout the ages; depending on the stage a culture is in and many other religious beliefs have found their way into the western world, we can nowadays see card number V: The Pope, as a representative of a more widely ranged set of spiritual components embedded in the way we look at life on the western material plane.

For some this will imply they begin to acknowledge a divine presence within themselves, while others will refer to the belief system they recognise themselves in, whether that’s Buddhism, Hinduism, Paganism, Humanism, Gnosticism or any other belief system that represents the way one thinks and feels about the existial basics of life..

When this card comes your way, you might want to contemplate on questions outside the logistics of life, such as : Why Am I here? What is my purpose in life? What gives my life meaning? Or the biggest biggie of  the Western World since the first recorded ‘Know Thyself ‘ inscription on the temple of Apollo in ancient Delphi, indicated people started to wonder about themselves: Who am I?

And of course…what better place to explore ones spiritual components than in ones dreamworld?

V: The Pope, is the 5th card of the 22 Archetypes of the Major Arcana, also known as the Bigger Secret. These 22 cards are divided in a so called Nil-card – without a number – and 3 rows of 7 cards. In total this makes 22 cards of which 21 are divided in 3 layers:

• The first row of 7 , cards I – VII characterises the life traveller on the Material World.
• The second row of 7 cards VIII- XIV characterises the Soul Journey of the life traveller
• The third row of 7 cards reflect the Spiritual Facets the life traveller is gifted at the birth and remain part of the Eternal Journey – including the present life on earth, regardless whether the life traveller is aware of this.

Looking at these 3 categories, the archetype of the Pope, the 5th card (out of 7) characterises the life traveller in the material world.

 to read more on how to practice the winter solstice contemplation ritual click here. 

 Click on The Pope  to read more on its meaning

 On the right side of this blog you can also draw your own card and see what it summons up from within.

The post V: The Pope appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

While the numerology of the number 4 is all about balance, as written on the 4 of Insights card, it can also be a bit limiting, like is stated on the 4 of  Challenges when set patterns get the better of us; or even boring to an a certain extent, when we start doing things automatically without thinking, like described on the 4 of Gifts.

When practiced as the art of observation however, as described on the 4 of Tools it can lead to a very balanced outlook on life. Like with all other  numbers, the number 4 is open to many different interpretations.

What do you associate the  number  4 with? What role does it play in your daily life? Does it ever occur in your dreams?

Suppose the 4 of insights was your inspiration card for this 4th night of the midwinter contemplation; what would it mirror for you?

 to read more on how to practice the winter solstice contemplation ritual click here. 

 Draw your own card on the right side of this blog and see what it summons up from within you.

 To read more on its meaning, the 4 of Insights.

The post 4 of Insights: Balance appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

The third card of the 12 day challenge of the winter solstice contemplation, explains a bit more about the 3 of Tools:  a cord of the minor arcana, also known as the lesser secret, that mirror your stand in daily life.

While the 22 cards of the major arcana – also known as the bigger secret- mirror the universal human characteristics each and everyone is born with; the minor arcana depicts how these characteristics are applied by each an everyone of us in a unique way in daily life. There are as many unique applications, as there are over  8 billion people in this world today.

With 3, as the number of creation and Tools as the suit of 14 cards that depict the worldly tools at our disposal to explore the material world, the 3 of Tools, with ‘dreams’ as its key word, plays an important part during the winter solstice contemplations.

Next to asking yourself what this card reflects in relation to your  explorations in daily life. the 3 of Tools also reminds you to explore your dreams to see what messages they might bring from the spiritual world or even your own deeper knowing.

 to read more on how to practice the winter solstice contemplation ritual click here. 

Of course you can also draw your own card on the right side of this blog and see what it summons up from within.

 To read more on its meaning, click the 3 of Tools.

The post 3 of Tools: Dreams appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

The Popess, the card carrying the roman numeral II, is all about the wisdom we all carry within as life-travellers on earth. She comes right after card I: the Illusionist. While the Illusionist can still paint a different picture diverting things from what they really are, the inner wisdom wisdom card characterised by the archetype of the Popess signifies what we know to be true deep down inside. Our intuition – no mattere how doubtful one is  at times about its properties – is hardly ever wrong.

The Popess is card number II  of  the row of 7 cards that are all related to the material plane. Within that physical reality she mirrors the characteristics of inner knowing and is closely connected to the realms of our dreamworlds.

Suppose this were your card to reflect on and take with you in your dreams.; what would it summon up for you?

 to read more on how to practice the winter solstice contemplation ritual click here. 

Of course you can also draw your own card on the right side of this blog and see what it summons up from within.

 Click on  the card of the pope’s to read more on its meaning.

The post II: The Popess, Inner Wisdom appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

What does the word potential summon up for you when you look back at 2024? Which Challenges came your way? Did they come for a reason? What did they have to tell you? How did you respond ? Which position did you take? What change did they encompass?

Yesterday, December 21st, I chose my first Nan Yar card in a series of 12 in the coming days, to contemplate on the experiences that came my way in 2024. By doing so I follow  a midwinter ritual originating from ancient times, when people were still highly connected to the natural world and abided by a  354-day moon calendar rather than a solar year 0f 365 (and a bit) days, leaving 12 days unaccounted for.

The card that I chose,  1 of Challenges , reminds me of my birthright to create my own life story.

Taking this awareness with me into sleep during the first winter solstice night resulted in a vivid dream in which I moved into a new spacious house with lots of windows with different views and lots and lots of bookcases filled with books. Also many people were helping me with this big move which made me feel supported and safe. What if this were your dream? What would it tell you?

The colour ‘Challenges’  (swords in the Tarot) in the Nan Yar interpretation is all about the development of the I-consciousness, the higher Self or spiritual part we all carry within, regardless of beliefs.

The number 1  in the Nan Yar interpretation is seen as the number of Potential.

Suppose this were your card to reflect on and take with you in your dreams.; what would it summon up for you?

Click here to read more on how to practice the winter solstice contemplation ritual

and the cosmic phenomenon that lies at the root it.

And of course you can also draw your own card on the right side of this blog and see what it reflects for you

 Click on  the card to read more about the 1 of challenges.

To an insightful midwinter contemplation

Ingrid

The post 1 of Challenges: Potential appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

Every Tarot card that comes your way, will mirror exactly that which applies to your unique life-journey , as you of all people holds the inner understanding on what your life’s mission is all about.

Do you sometimes wonder how a Tarot card seems to reflect exactly that which applies to what  evolves in your life story?  The answer to this secret is perhaps less mysterious as you might think.  A little courage and honesty towards yourself opens gateways to self reflection that give you total freedom of choice.

 Sample the exploration of your life journey here:  

Did you know that 56 out of the total of 78 cards of the Game of Tarot, are based on the ordinary card game, and that this ‘Minor Arcana’ or  ‘Lesser Arcana’ as it is called, adapted Spades, Clubs, Hearts and Diamonds; using their Number- and Court-cards to give a deeper meaning to daily life experiences?

Starting with a simple playing card has the potential to give you insight in the meaning  behind common or more challenging daily life experiences.

The number one rule when interpreting a card! 
When using ordinary cards – or any oracle for that matter- it is of the utmost importance to refrain from (self) judgment or pre-conceived convictions on who you think you are and allow your True Self be The Storyteller. You are the conductor, musician and instrument of your life-journey. The interpretation you give to what takes place, determines the outcome.

Here’s how to mirror your inner knowing through an ordinary playing card.

• Use a separate piece of paper or start a journal assigned to card interpretations, and note down when, where and optionally why you draw a card. When reflecting on a card later on, remembering the spot on earth where you were when you consulted a card, will help refresh your memory of the experience.

• Shuffle a deck of ordinary cards, draw one and record its Colour (Spades, Clubs, Hearts, Diamonds), Number (1-10)and/or Court characteristics

• Observe the triggers the card holds for you. What is reflected by the combination of Colour and Number or Court card. What does your  inner knowing have to say about it?

• Add your findings to your paper or journal.

For guidance use the Nan Yar – Who Am I Interpretation Overviews below
of the Colours, Number and Court-cards.

Interpretation of the Colours: Spades, Clubs, Hearts, Diamonds

• Spades reflect the Challenges in which you encounter yourself during your Life journey (the invited ánd uninvited ones)

• Clubs reflect the Insights you gain from the Challenges.

• Hearts reflects the Gifts you were freely given along with your birthright.

• Diamonds reflect the earthly Tools that accompany you during your life journey

Interpretation of the Numbers 1-10 (using the Ace as 1) 

1   : Number of Potential  

2   : Number of Diversity, Freedom of Choice

3   : Number of Creativity  

4   : Number of Balance

5   : Number of your Soul Mission, your quest

6   : Number of Communication

7   : Number of What Is, Is Enough; Taking responsibility  over what Is

8   : Number of your Life Journey, Karma, Dao or Tao

9   : Number of Unconditional Love

10:  Number of Unity, Wholeness, Earth as part of the Universe and the Universe as part of Earth.

Interpretation of Jack, Queen and King. 

Jack     : Represents the characteristics of who you are on the physical plane and selects how you juggle your life experiences as Gatekeeper of your journey on earth.

Queen : Represents the Yin Energy, Bodywork, the soft wind of Resilience

King     :Represents the Yang Energy, Breath work, Vigour

***

I regularly give live presentations on how to apply simple playing cards as a life journey exploration tool and introduction to the Nan Yar – Who Am I  

Individual life counseling sessions and Pilgrimcircles,

Next presentation:  Tuesday 20th of February from 16.00 – 18.00 in Scheveningen (The Hague) 

Registration through the contactform open till February 18th.   –   max 16 participants  –  contribution 20 euro.

The post Self reflection with an ordinary card game appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

A locksmith came to my house recently. Using his strong grip, my oldest son  had opened the front door from the outside while it was on its safety lock on the inside. Apparently, when you manage to do that, something shifts within the lock, causing the key to stay stuck in the lock unless the lock is turned back to its safety position; all very complicated.

Fortunately the locksmith quickly came to my aid and turned out to be a jovial man with 20 years of experience in his trade.

‘I still love it’ he said answering my question on how he liked his job. ‘Every day is different and I come across the weirdest situations’.

‘Such as…? I dared.

The answer came swiftly. ‘Once a family called me up in total panic.  The door of the room in which a deceased family member had been laid for the wake, kept opening without apparent reason.  That was scary, especially at night, when the door would unexpectedly open, much like in a horror movie.  The solution, the family felt,  was to place a lock on the door, so they could sleep peacefully. So I placed a lock and yes the door stayed put, unless of course they forgot to lock it.’

‘Did you believe it to be a  supernatural occurrence?’

‘Ofcourse not!’ the lockmaker firmly answered. ‘The coffin is placed on a cooling element and it was a small room. It turns cold quickly.. That triggers a difference in air pressure between the hallway and the small room. At a certain point the door will spontaneously succumb to that, especially at night for then the door stays shut the longest and the little room gets cold easiest.

Now some people might find a story like this disrespectful; but when you think about it, it are exactly these mundaine occurences, the weird happenings, that at times make it easier to talk about death or a wake. In western culture people often still keep their distance from death. We don’t really know what to say about it.  In spite of the big steps being made in making dying and mourning more understandable; it is still often viewed with fear and seen as a difficult subject. It was only a short while ago when people in the end of life phase were separated from the living and when relatives processed their grief alone. Religious people were given a sermon, but everyday life gave little opportunity to show feelings or exchange experiences. ‘What was it like for you to witness the end of a life? What experience did it give you?

Stories like the mysterious opening of the door are in fact portals to expressing emotion. The fear, the confusion en in the end the humor, when it turned out to be a natural phenomenon. Then it becomes a family anecdote; ‘Remember when he had just passed away …’? It enables reminiscing; the good memories, the sad but also the funny ones. Death doesn’t always need to be lofty and solemn. It is ….in the end …pardon the pun ….also part of a lifetime in which funny things happen.

The One of Insights

A fitting card with this experience would be the 1 of insights, as an example of becoming aware that what we think we witness, can differ from what is actually happening. We sometimes lead ourselves to believe in ghost stories that turn out to be way different than expected.

Mind you! This goes the other way around as well, when we discard unexplained experiences and give them a ‘perfectly reasonable explanation’ because to witness them is so outside of our comfort zone that we prefer to look the other way.

Whatever way you look at it; nothing has only one explanation. Everyone experiences life differently and is entitled to that.

Click the card for further explanation or draw your own card at the right of this page; and see which mind jab your inner wisdom has in store for you.

The post The Unexpected Explained appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

Attachment to outcome, a true story on self-fullflilling prophesy, a 3 minutes and 3 second listen to

I once heard a story that came from a 200 year old little booklet , holding records of  real life court cases from the 18th century. The particular story I am going to tell you about, always stayed with me as it so pointedly shows how following predictions made by others – rather than your own sound judgement and free will –  can become an awkward self fulfilling prophesy.

Here’s how it goes:

Somewhere in the seventeen hundreds a young man of reasonable wealthy means goes to a fortuneteller. The fortuneteller tells him his life will be full of pleasures and he will never lack money; however ,….he will die at the age of 32.

Now remember this is a true story based on a true court case.

At first the young man is a little taken aback by the prediction he will die in his early thirties, but according to the court case records, he decides to make the best of the years he has left. Bearing the fortunetellers prediction in mind; he decides to thoroughly enjoy and indulge himself the pleasures of life. And so he does indeed. But then he turns 32 in excellent state of health. No one has challenged him to a duel; all around him everything seems peaceful and quiet; except for the fact he is in severe debt.

Thinking he was  only to live to be 32 years of age the young man spent all his resources And since spending all his own money went a bit quicker than he expected; he also borrowed quite substantial amounts from others; knowing….or should I say thinking….death would be his ally in escaping his debts.

Here’s where the court case comes in. The young man was arrested and imprisoned. In the court case records he explains his misadventures.

The morale of this story it seems to me is to never be guided by what others predict will happen to you, as that has potentially disastrous consequences. Follow your own gut feeling instead, rather than be lured into the temptation that promises you miracles. We all get our challenges, in spite of what other people predict will happen.

The 18th century court case story reminds me a little of our 21st century commercials; where we are promised flawless lives as long as we use the products advertised. Just as with the  young man; they are only temptations that will make you spend your money, rather than invest your own sound judgment.

O and by the way, the prediction came through all the way. After using his lifetime to spend all his money; the young man died at the age of 32; in prison. He hung himself.

The card that goes with this is card number XVI The Tower. People often shy away from this card as in our material world it seems to depict doom and failure; having to give up the riches in life and the hopes of Fate. One of these I will…..

Looked upon from a spiritual point of view however this card from the third row of 7 cards mirroring the prerogatives of the spiritual world; is about letting go of old convictions and patterns that hamper your true destiny in life.  “Come out of the ivory tower” so to speak

To learn more about its meaning, click the card.

The abridged version of this blog, as published below, was written and recorded for ‘Dutchbuzz’, the radioprogram for Internationals on The Hague FM, every Tuesday evening in season from 8 till 9 p.m.

The post Attachment to Outcome appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

Don’t Offer the Good Biscuits; Abridged version of the spoken end-of-the-program-blog of June 11 2019 for Dutchbuzz; the radio broadcast for Internationals on The Hague FM, every Tuesday from 9-10 when in season.

a 3 minute listen to.

In the world around me I see a lot of angry people. Angry at their governments for taking down perfectly healthy trees to feed the bio mass ovens. Angry about animals in the bio-industry being maltreated. Angry at the present president of the United States, – the one whose name we do not mention.  Angry at multinationals being exempt from paying taxes; while other workers- who earn far less than multinational CEO’s –  are being mauled between the millstones of the Dutch tax system.

And all of this is true! All angry people have every right to be! There is loads of injustice in the world! There are a great many inconsistencies in how things are divided. It is true people who pay mandatory health care premiums die or remain ill because the Dutch healthcare system denies them the care they are entitled to. And again the CEO’s of these insurance companies have million plus yearly salaries. Why? Because they are good at squeezing money out of the system they are part of; rather than good for the people they should be serving. It is all true! And yes the present president of the United States is a blatant liar and totally unfit to rule that office. Future historians and investigators will find he committed more than the just now visible crimes against humanity to serve his own interest and that of the billionaire people in his vicinity; the rich who apparently never have enough.

There’s also local injustice. Politicians lying through their teeth during election-time. Deals behind closed doors. Decisions by civil servants ruining other peoples lives; simply because they can.  All of that happening in your own city; a place where one would expect things to be just; a place that should  be just.

The thing though about targeting the negative is that it tends to take up the place of the positive.  Of course one should object against injustice. Beware however of getting stuck. Remember to also pay attention to the things going right. It is much healthier to put the main focus on the good things of life.   Positivity preserves and multiplies the radiant energies. Put the bad happenings in perspective by approaching them with a good sense of humor like the sign someone held up during the recent state visit in England of you know who;  saying : ‘Dear Queen, don’t offer him the good biscuits’

When we emanate the negative; we attract the negative.  Emanate the positive and attract the positive. This Universal law applies to everything.

So my humble take on this is:

• Humor the negative things
• Understand the Injustice without allowing it to take you Hostage
• Make the Difference
• Be The Change
• Live to Be Grateful
• Evolve into a life changing human being

While there are plenty of Nan Yar-Who Am I cards that fit the bill connected to the subject of replacing the negative with the positive (basically all cards really) I ‘happened’ (do these things really happen by accident?) to bump into a lovely practice presented by Prune Harris; one of the teachers I highly value in Energy Medicine.

This 7 minute meditation helps release emotions that no longer serve you

Wishing you loads of positive vibes and energy

Ingrid

The post Don’t Offer the Good Biscuits appeared first on EN Energycounseling.nl.

Who Do You Think You Are? This is more than the question on where you come from. You might think who you are is determined by the name
you were given at birth, the family you grew up in or  the cultural values that you were taught; yet a whole lot of who you are, depends on who you think you are.

The way we think about ourselves determines basically everything.  Thoughts, the intentions behind what you plan to do and  the assumptions you have about yourself  and your capabilities, precede everything else and play a major role in the outcome of whatever it is you undertake in life.

The way we think about ourselves however, is highly influenced by what others think of us.  When we’re being bullied we start to doubt ourselves. Thoughts tumbling in our minds ‘What is wrong with me? Why is this happening to me instead of someone else?”
I would say there is nothing wrong with you. Even more so, I would say there is something wrong with the people doing that to you. They are probably bullying because you mirror something that threatens them.  And the people following the people who are bullying do so because they fail to think for themselves. Some primal gene makes them follow the pretender.

Then there is the 20th century invention of television; television commercials, reality t.v,  next to glossies, gossip magazines, politicians, historians, multinationals and social media. Together they wash your brain thousands of impulses a day, telling you how to think. And again also here there is apparently  some programming within the human species that makes us follow the adventures of the Kardashians, gloat over Jersey-, Geordie- or our own The Hague Barbie shore. In some cases we even want to mimic them; to be as thin as the one; stay as young as the other, on which my dear friend Anne recently quoted:

We all want to become old, but none of us wants to be old.

Its all in our heads! How old, fat, smart, successful, good looking, loving, kind, or special we are all depends on how we think about ourselves. Unfortunately we all grew up in a society with the emphasis on what is wrong rather than praise over what is right.

So my take on this is :

Never let what other people think of you be more important than what you think of yourself.

You’d be surprised how it will clarify communication; or as my father used to put it:

Basically one person is 3 people.

• The one he truly is,
• The one he thinks he is and
• The one he thinks other people think he is.

When two people communicate with each other, the big question is: which of the three is talking to which of the three.

The card that goes with sort of thinking is The Queen of Insights: Who Am I

• ‘Queen’ as she is the ultimate Yin energy, with Yin energy being all about self care, self validation, self recognition
• ‘Insights” as it is all about the things we learn in the course of life; in this case about ourselves.

To read more click the link or card at the top of this blog

Ingrid Schippers, November 2018

The abridged spoken version of this blog, features as end note on  ‘Dutchbuzz’, the radio hour for Internationals, every Tuesday  from 10 to 11 pm on ‘Den Haag FM’ and can be found in the Programme Archive of  the Dutchbuzz podcasts, dated November 27, 2018

OR you can click and listen to the file below:

And on the right of this blog, you can draw your own card …

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Life has a habit of bringing us these day-to-day challenges. Next to the big stuff, we also get the small irritations between partners or petty power struggles at the office; parents, children, businesspartners… Any relationship really has its own bumps in the road and even small pebbles can cause big impact on our functioning together;  leaving us somewhat bewildered at times; distracted from our own banner and what we want our daily lives to look like.

But as someone once explained to me:

Relationships are there to learn from rather than to be happy in.

I took me  a while; but measuring this piece of wisdom against some of my own daily life little struggles with people around me I have come to believe, it is indeed the eventual learning, the process of figuring out the lesson and drawing your own conclusions that makes us happier in the end.  If the other person in a relationship would solely be there to make our lives work the way we want, there would be no challenge, no ground for exploration left for ourselves. Just imagine how boring that would be. Plus we would be totally dependent on that other person.

So the ultimate challenge in day-to-day life may well be to avoid being drawn into another person’s storyline and the way this person chooses to behave. Instead figure out and learn how you feel about something; what is important for you in life, rather than have someone else  hijacking your thoughts and feelings, your life basically.

How to stay close to who you are,  that is the question. How to stay in your own lane on the path we are all travel together.

Here’s a possible 3-step recipe.

1 : Forget the Blame.

Avoid feeling wronged. Things are as they are. Mulling about the injustice done or running around in blame-circles will keep you needlessly occupied while you could be doing totally different things with your life. So:

Be Careful What You Mull For

 2: Forgive

The most effective way to stop Mulling is to Forgive. The Magic of Forgiveness is that it liberates you all on your own accord, as it is you who changes the energy of the situation and creates a way to let go of the venom. And it goes both ways. Asking for forgiveness has the exact same effect… So:

Surf the Magic of Forgiveness

3: Be Grateful

The third thing is to be grateful you’ve stopped Mulling; have been Forgiven or have found it within you to Forgive. Rather than trying to mend a struggle and convince people to see things your way, alter it into the best antidote you can think of:

Smother it with compassion.

Allow people their own space, their own mistakes, their own wrongs and their own rights. If we would all do that, I think daily life would be a whole lot more agreeable.

The card that goes with this is the 6 of Insights; the 6 being the number of communication and relationships; the Insights the suit all to do with personal development.

Click the card for further explanation and see how it reflects for you. I wish you a compassionate, forgiving and blame-free time to come.

Ingrid Schippers, 30-10-2018

Draw your own card on the right of this blog

More Questions? Mail me at info@energycounseling.nl

The abridged spoken version of this blog, features as end note on  ‘Dutchbuzz’, the radio hour for Internationals every Tuesday  from 10 to 11 pm on ‘Den Haag FM and can be found in the Programme Archive of  the Dutchbuzz podcasts, dated  October 30, 2018.

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Hardly no one needs reminding what day it is today.  9/11 is branded in our memories as the day the world changed.  You would think, after the thousands of years and generations humanity spent evolving; we would have learned to live a little bit more at peace with each other ; but instead division and polarization still seem to be the ruling words of the day, with the mindset of politicians and media and their focus on economic gain encouraging the divide and rule policies that keep people apart.

Fortunately I’m an optimist. It is my personal belief the world eventually will change for the better. That people will learn to live peacefully together.  When I look around me I see a lot examples of that going on. People looking for new, more sustainable ways of living and ways to overcome adversity, seeking out a path of personal development with personal ways of looking at the world; seeking their own and natural healing methods; understanding the relationship between a healthy body, a healthy mind and a healthy spirit.

In order to evolve however it seems humanity needs to go through some harsh experiences first; individually, but also as a family, community, culture or even as the world as a whole.

I’ve found it roughly takes 3 keys to wake up to reality and open the door to a better world:

1. First something life-changing  has to happen. Mostly this is something you would never think of inviting into your life and at all times  would try and avoid.  It seems however to be an unavoidable first step on the path of awakening; he willingness to confront whatever it is that kicks you in the proverbial behind. There are very few people who wake up in the morning and spontaneously decide to step onto a seemingly challenging path. More often it kicks you out of comfort zone totally unexpected.

Card number XV, The Antiforce, the first card and Gatekeeper of the 3rd row of 7 cards defining the Archetypes of the spiritual layer of existence is the archetype embodying the life-changing challenges that will cross your path. It can also be seen as one’s shadow; the side of ourself we rather avoid. Which is why we need…

2. Step two; the need to step out of denial.   Some of us fiercely hang on to their old ways of thinking, ignoring the possible flaws it might contain; convinced this is the safest way to live our lives. Once you’ve been kicked out of the comfort zone however (step 1) there is little chance of turning back.  You will have to get used
to letting go of conditioned thinking and inflexible principles and learn to let go of attachments, the importance of what people think of you; and walk your own personal path; that is what you are here to do.

Card number XVI, The Tower, or as I have dubbed in the Nan Yar  personal development cards, Detachment the second card of the 3rd row of 7 cards defining the Archetypes of the spiritual layer of existence, depicts how two people fall out of their carefully structured convictions, conditioning and belief systems. You fall, but you fall to earth, rather than into an abyss, which makes a difference.  Stepping out of denial means taking an honest look at what you really represent;who you really are,  doing the reality check. Perhaps the carefully constructed narrative on how successful and fulfilled you feel and how great the holidays really are needs some more honesty here and there.

The third step to spiritual awakening is about living by example; being the Star in your own universe. Seeing the first glimpse of what else is possible after having shed your old skin.  The secret of the Star is that there is only one way to change the world,( including your own) and that is to start with yourself, to be the change.

The Star is also the third card of the third row of 7 cards defining the Archetypes of the Spiritual path., card number XVII.  In the Nan Yar – Who Am I personal development cards I’ve named it  Starring by Example.

To learn more about the background and meaning of the cards and see how they reflect on your personal experience, click the cards and follow your instincts.

Of course there’s loads more to tell  about this subject  and how it relates to your personal situation.  To learn more click the cards; look at their meaning and how that reflects on your inner knowing.

Ingrid Schippers September 11, 2018

click the cards to read more on their meaning.

Questions? Mail me at info@energycounseling.nl

The abridged spoken version of this blog, features as end note on  ‘Dutchbuzz’, the radio hour for Internationals every Tuesday  from 10 to 11 pm on ‘Den Haag FM and can be found in the Programme Archive of  the Dutchbuzz podcasts, dated September 11 , 2018.

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